Declutter

May 16, 2021 3:27 PM

Cairo, Egypt

Hello World,

I am decluttering since last year, and it never ends. I have been doing it on and off, and now i think this is the next phase
(not the second, but its just the upcoming phase of the process)

so far i have done a great deal, but my sense of realizing and monitoring this process is a little constrained by my short memory (or so i claim). I am slowly shifting to a more digital based method for documentation, as a sort of seeking expertise in the fields of organizing, documenting, and monitoring oneself.

that of course is only a secondary action of life, as the primary one is to survive, be healthy, and enjoy. as for what i intend to do with all of this, is to play the game of life in a creative way full of adventures, and life fulfilling actions.

here it goes...

05.06.23
Siwa Oasis, Egypt

New to this space…

Spaces boggle me, i tend to be so sensitive to my surroundings. I grew up in my own chaos and lack of order. Every time i would got a café to work, i would be like: “how productive was i out of my home space?

I mean, it makes a lot of sense; a well-lit space, serving coffee and tea, everyone is in work mode around you, or at least minding their own business. I can’t go check the fridge for answers to life questions every 5 minutes… in a workspace or a cafe, i am in my most focused mode.

But i tend to build a habit of familiarity over spaces. And the moment i feel comfortable in the place, you can say goodbye to my productivity. The coffee did help, but once the pattern of work moved from “focused” to “i am in my safe place”, i can no longer finish my tasks. As if something in my mind is programmed to only work under pressure…

My thoughts about this now after i wrote it down…

“what an abusive relationship i got there with my mind…”

Work under pressure

Yes, it is a great skill, but sign me out. I. am. Done…

Architecture (5 years of abuse)

What a great place to learn, Faculty of Architecture Engineering. What a great lie.

In life, everything can be your teacher, the 2 kinds of teachers you’ll face will be the ones who take you by the hand up a steep hill, or the ones who push you off a cliff. Architecture was the latter

I mean, I was exposed to a great deal of knowledge and practices in those 5 years, but i never was really ready for this kind of torture. 5 intensive years of overloading my body and mind with a wide range of disciplines, practices, projects, exams, quizzes, finals, midterms, submissions, jury, grades, evaluation, portfolio, training, hustling, bustling, midnight chores, topics, paperwork, mcqs, group projects, presentations….. Ugh, the list can just go on

I graduated from Architecture Engineering & Technologies (AET) from Cairo University Faculty of Engineering (CUFE) Credit Hours System (CHS) in 2019. Upon my graduation, i decided to quit. Shortly after, the pandemic happened, and it came as the best opportunity for the whole world to approve of my decision to take a break after those 5 years…

Major life declutter journey

The whole purpose of everything I am doing links to the core of my beliefs about life and death.

I believe that life is a beautiful order out of a huge messiness. It is in the core of creation, life, and all sciences: The world is undoubtedly an intricate Order to an infinite possibility of chaos.

And so, I have decided to work on my order, as to imitate the universal ways, in order to truly appreciate this magnificence that we live. This order i am seeking is very personal, as i have only a set of interests and skills and scope of life that is very exclusive to my own person. Therefore, what i experience is 100% tailored to fit only myself, my beliefs, vision, goals, dreams, and things that ups my levels of excitement in my life.

Personal Space

A little bit of background over where i lived and grew up: i only got aware of the idea of personal space when my sister had travelled abroad for work and left me the space all to myself. Prior to that she would call our room the kingdom “El Mamlaka”. And we would put up decorations and paintings to personalize the space.

Later on my family moves to another home, where i got to have my own room that i can fully personalize, at that time i had grown significantly and already had some apparent interests an inspirations to how i would love my room to look like.

I wanted paintings, shelves for books, small statues, cool posters, things on the wall and on the corner. All of these were things I’ve picked up from cool rooms that I must’ve gotten impressed by when I was growing up

A few years later, we move again to another house, the one in which i spent most of my university years in, and where my family is still settled. I had the same attitude towards my first personal room, but this time, since i was already in my architecture years, things started to get a little out of control.

Declutter

I’ve been hoarding

I needed an out. I was tired of staying unproductive in my messy room. While the options were not much during lockdown, i figured, this was the perfect time since i’ve got nothing to do or place to go. I am gonna get rid of everything in this room that served no purpose…

While the idea in itself had been floating over my mind for some time, I’ve had this planned a long time ago. And probably that was even the excuse i would use when i would hoard more and more. I would say: “Alright, let’s bring it on, the more i collect, the more the decluttering would be dramatic.”, and boy, i loved drama. My favorite music genre is death metal, how can i not be dramatic?

The idea was sparked from a documentary that i saw about minimalism. It made me realize i have a problem with attachment. It also aligned so well with my Buddhist tendencies. Not that I am Buddhist, but it inspired me the sight of a symbolic Budha sitting there having nothing. I said to myself back then: “Oh well, good luck for me with all these shelves full of “not nothings”.. So many of them” that also was a statement just for the drama.

Graffiti? Why not..

Unlike what we learned from the Architect Ludwig Mies van der Rohe, the concept to my room was MORE is MERRIER

I think this particular bit was inspired from a visit to a friend during my childhood, and finding his room wall filled with markings from visitors, something similar to what you would find on a berlin club toilet wall. It looked cool, but the dark side to it is that it was starting to be a bit too much… almost as stinky as the club’s toilet (not quite literally, but you get the idea)

Would that be a viable excuse to my lack of productivity? Constant procrastination? I mean, this room never had propper access to natural lighting and ventilation. The close proximity to my guitar also was definitely a reason. It was always so much more fun to play Master of puppets than making boring research, or God forbid, an assignment…

Ok ok ok, i understand, there were many factors to hang my problems on.

Interestingly enough, one of these things that has a positive influence on me is the passion for ordering things. Honestly i don’t know if this interest came first, or my personal understanding of how the world works (in order). Who came first? The chicken or the egg?

and so my interest in organizing stuff and putting them into place, and creating new ways of organizing (Ordering) through design thinking and seeking innovative solutions. Both in which are majors of my personal expertise that I have been studying throughout 5 years in Architecture school, and even prior to that through exploring creativity in the most unusual ways from a very young age. This all have finally mixed well in the brew that have cultivated both my interest and experience in many creative fields.

though creativity can be in any field, which brings up my own personal dilemma, the lack of focus!!

Now ironically, because I have exposed my-self to so many fields in the small period of my life time, I find myself in a mess all the time, both physically and mentally. But, this is the reason I am now focused more on the organizational part rather than a specific field and aspect to my interests.

My claim (and hope) is that when I analyze and understand my self, belongings, behaviors, actions, I will finally be able to order this mess in my chaotic life, and finally make sense of all of this through the projects I always dream about

"day dreaming: an addiction, a disease, creative but mind consuming"

This is going to be one whole life constitution. Something like a personal bible for living and creating. It's Technical, spiritual, philosophical, as well as emotional at times.

this digital realm helps in my organizational, and documentational process, and makes way for more important outcomes rather than my extreme focus on the tools!

My next phase will have a mix of documenting the past events and results of previous declutters, with the current flow of development

it is very important to be consistent in this process as this will be my daily exercise for mindfulness and a new technical aspect in my journey